Irreplaceable [2/2]

Pairing: Taeyeon/Jessica.

G; nothing is easy in love, but the saddest thing is when you lose it, especially if you had never imagined your life without that other person. There are times when other people get in between and ruin it, unknowingly to the two who are in love. This story concentrates on a painful break up (that probably shouldn’t even count as one) of Taeyeon and Jessica, and a second chance 6 years later.


6 YEARS AGO

“I’m on my way, Yoong… wait, that would work too. I will be there in just few minutes you can go and meet me in the street,”I ended conversation with my best friend while driving in a limo. Obviously in the backseat. Yes, Taengoo wanted that I showed up to our wedding in a limo. She’s even more romantic that I am. I guess she’s responsible for all the romance in our relationship, but I never complained as I can’t be as brave and free with my feelings as she is.

Taengoo knows that I’m a bit nervous about our marriage. We have been together for some time, actually a long time and she was the one who proposed to me. I remember it clearly… every detail of it. Having some time until reaching both Yoong and the Church I decided to look back at those memories.

xxx

My taxi stopped and after paying the driver I step out of the car looking around curious until I noticed Taengoo standing on the small white bridge. Obviously she waited for me all this time (it took me about an hour to come here because of work distractions and I was really apologetic about the delay.) Her eyes were on me the moment I stepped out of the vehicle.

Taeyeon walked slowly in my direction when the driver left and we somehow met halfway. I smiled mischievously knowing that my best friend and my girlfriend planned something, just unsure what exactly that was.

“I don’t see Yoona anywhere…  and she’s the one who asked me to rush here.”

Taengoo laughed while commenting and explaining “I have performed a magic trick and made her disappear. So now you will have to spend time with me… as disappointing as it sounds.”

I pretended to be annoyed but couldn’t stop the smile that appeared on my face. “I have never thought that Yoong could be such a good liar… she didn’t even flinch when I called her to ask about our meeting and apologizing that I will be running late.”

Taeyeon shrugged her shoulder while linking her arm with mine “well… I asked very politely for her help. Yoona just couldn’t tell me no.”

“What did you promise her?”

Taeyeon just laugh but I knew that most likely it was something Seohyun related as Yoona is seriously interested in that girl. Whenever we try talking about other topics it somehow still ends up with Seohyun. Seohyun just got her driver’s license. Seohyun just bought a new car… yes, I also saw Seohyun in that shop…and so on. I think you can imagine what I have in mind. We all have this kind of friend.

We walked to the bridge and stood on it. Well actually Taeyeon stopped and turn around to face me “and there’s a reason why you’re here with me instead of your friend. I know you would prefer the later..hehehe… but…”

I widened my eyes as a good theatrical actress (if I was one) “well I would have dressed better knowing that I’m meeting you. Your loss.”

“I don’t care if you go around in pajamas with dinosaurs or puppies, or cats, or bunnies on it, I will still believe that it looks good on you.”

I squinted my eyes and blushed a little which made me want to change this topic instantly. Until Taeyeon noticed it and didn’t use it as some sort of opportunity. “But it’s really beautiful here. You love showing things like this to me…I should have guessed that no way Yoong would have invited me to see such scenery”, I added with ‘duh’ written on my forehead (figuratively speaking.)

Taeyeon seemed to miss out on comment about Yoona and instead took both of my hands in hers “well… it doesn’t matter how you get here. The most important part is that you’re here now.”

“Mmm… I feel like I have heard this many times before.”

“Maybe that’s just expression I use… but this is important to me,” she added making serious face and for some reason letting go of my hands.

“Are you going to break up with me?” I ended up asking without giving a chance for Taeyeon to speak up. Maybe I have panicked a little bit. Well… not maybe… I did panic for a moment.

“What? No. You wish,” she said jokingly which helped with the mood. Taeyeon looked really nervous now and I started wondering what might be the reason for it.

Looking around and gathering her courage she finally spoke up, not breaking eye contact with me “I’m not even sure how to describe how nervous I’m right now… I’m nervous both about my speech and about your reaction. Either way… I’m hoping for the best.”

While she talked it started raining slowly. “Okay… maybe the fact that weather changed so drastically is not such a good sigh” she added while biting her lip and looking down.

For that reason I suggested simply “well…ehm… we can go in your car if you want… you drove here, right?” and I almost turn around to walk in that direction after actually noticing Taeyeon’s car, but my girlfriend stopped me while grabbing me by the hand.

“No…no… I better do this now. As long as I’m still…somewhat brave…”

Taeyeon breathed in more air while kneeling on the ground, taking black little box from her pocket.

“Jessica Jung… you’re the girl I love. The girl I always dreamed about. Person I want to spend the rest of my life with. In good and bad. Whatever comes our way. Would you like to marry me and make me the happiest person on this planet?”

Taeyeon asked the full question, considering the fact that I let her finish as a good sigh. It still rained around us, this time even harder, and Taeyeon waited for my answer with hopeful expression.

I looked down a bit nervous, I don’t know if Taengoo could have read my emotions and sense that nervousness, but obviously I had a lot of it. Despite all that, it didn’t take me long to answer ‘YES!’ and hug her as tightly as I could. Taeyeon even complained that she couldn’t breathe.

But the truth is that with that question she made me the happiest girl on this planet. I didn’t even need that wedding…I was already happy as it is.

xxx

I think I got lost in the memories because that was the last thing I remembered. This scene kept on repeating in my mind while I was in coma. Contrary to the popular belief I didn’t really hear what my visitors told me. Instead I kept reliving it and was actually happy. I’m not sure if even wanted to wake up. Would you want to wake up from the most beautiful dream ever?

Somehow I still did. Then Yoona told me about what had happened. A truck hit my limo in front of her eyes. That’s why she didn’t manage to go to Church and stayed by my side instead. She only called Taeyeon’s parent and didn’t even call to tell other friends of ours, too panicked about the whole situation.

Yoona wanted to do it next day but Taeyeon wasn’t there anymore. She didn’t visit me even once, though Yoona had talked with her parents and even asked them to BEG for her to show up and maybe then I would wake up sooner.

Taeyeon even changed her phone number. I know this…because despite being angry and hurt after leaving the hospital I still tried to call her. Though almost a year passed with me in a coma.

Surprisingly I have never blamed Taeyeon. I was angry… but not as much as person in this situation would usually be. They would just turn around, move on, never think of a person that left them on their worse and didn’t even check on them ever again. I tried moving on… I have traveled a lot… but still thought about Taengoo constantly.

I didn’t manage to find another love. I tried but never hard enough…and it never actually turned into any sort of relationship that would be worth either mine or that person’s time. I felt like taking a break all these six years. Like the time actually stopped for me the moment when that truck hit my limo.

But finding out that everything is not as it seems… that Taeyeon actually got a break up letter from someone who pretended to be me… I wasn’t sure what to think. Still somehow… I had hope… Sunny did shake her head when I asked if Taeyeon is actually happy. If she’s not… if this marriage is not going to make her happy… why can’t I try to at least find out the truth? Who and why they wrote that letter? Why I didn’t find the love of my love next to me when I woke up?

So many questions and so little time to get all the answers…

xxx

 

PRESENT TIME

I was about to read that break up letter again and torture myself even more if I haven’t heard familiar-confused voice.

“W-what are you doing here?” Taeyeon asked while unconscionably dropping down her keys.

She squinted her eyes and seemed beyond angry.

“What are you doing at my home? I’m calling the police if you’re not leaving right now… and what…” she was going to ask what I have in my hand but I think she recognized the letter. “Why…why…are you holding it?”

I panicked a little bit. Unsure how I should feel right now. Sad? Angry? Happy that Taeyeon left with me with a reason? Which emotion would be normal in such weird and unpredictable situation?

Also, why Yoona didn’t alarm me that Taeyeon is coming back home. That girl is probably hiding somewhere around the corner and talking with Seohyun on the phone. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s literally the case.

“I have it…because I have just learnt of the existence of it from you few days ago… also I wanted to know what this is. It is the first time I’m seeing this…thing,” I added while looking shortly at the envelope with letter inside of it.

Taeyeon raised her eyebrows shortly “wow…really? What do you really want, Jessica? Destroy my second wedding? Do I have some sort of curse that I just can’t get married or the world will end? I’m so tired of this…” she commented and actually sigh.

I could see that Taeyeon meant what she said. Also, my Taengoo looked more tired than usual.

“Why would I lie? Am I someone who just wants to hurt you and destroy your happiness?”

“I don’t know! Are you?” once again, that tired tone, tired eyes but still some sparking anger behind them.

After a surprise that Taengoo might actually think this way, it took me some time to voice out my thoughts. Actually, some time to process and gather it as well.

“I mean it, Jessica… I’m calling the police. How did you get in my home? I do have security… I’m so tired of…all of this…”

“You do seem tired…”

I somehow ended saying without considering the outcome. Obviously Taeyeon will get mad at me because of it. She will think that I’m teasing her in some way. She’s already thinking the worse of me. But not hearing her comment or screams I added.

“Call the police.”

“Eh?”

“I don’t care. Call the police. I won’t leave until we have a normal conversation… even if you’re really tired and want to sleep… if you fall asleep I can just sit here and wait until you wake up. I’m just as tired as you are. Waking up in the hospital without you beside me…finding out that you left to see the world, the fact that you change your phone number and I couldn’t even call you to tell you that I’m finally awake…you know what… that was also the worse experience of my life. Worse than getting hit by a truck. So I’m tired too. We’re talking this through.”

“W-what?”

I could see confusion written all over her face. Even if I wouldn’t believe Taeyeon’s sincerity this would prove it straight away. That’s the face of someone who really has no idea what you’re talking about and hears it for the very first time.

“I hadn’t written this letter. It is impressive…I will give you that… I did have my doubts, haven’t I? It describes the situation quite well… ACTUALLY… there are certain parts which I only told your parents. As ironic as that sounds.”

Taeyeon let me talk just standing there and staring in front of herself and I used this time to look back at the letter.

“For example… I mentioned my doubts about our marriage to them… but also, pointed out that I haven’t talked with you about it. Just like this line: But they always stayed in my head… torturing me…I had also mentioned that it is probably the worst possible moment to have these doubts as our wedding is just around the corner… Just like this line: I’m choosing the worst possible moment to say this… but if not now…when?

“Stop…”

I heard Taengoo begging quietly but I was in too deep. I just needed to finish it. I felt that while voicing everything out… I will understand the situation as well.

“I told them…that the reason I love you some much is because you always stayed by my side and fought for our love even when I was a coward. Exact replica of that is in this letter too: I also realize its unfair to you no matter what I do. Especially when you stayed by my side…fought for this love. Your parents have witnessed both your pervert comments and skin ship which is also mentioned in the letter. Even the last point… about asking that you wouldn’t hate me. That’s what would I say! They read me like an open book, haven’t they? And you do realize that your parents always hated me, right?”

Taengoo shook her head slightly. She looked a bit… distant.

“Well…maybe you were the only one unaware of this fact. Everyone else knew this… I know that Tiffany hates me now…but I’m pretty sure that even she can confirm it. Also, you can just pay someone to write such letter! They can even copy your handwriting! I don’t understand how everyone could have been so dense! Yoona hadn’t talked with Tiffany and Sunny for years…I didn’t know about this stupid letter for so long… most of the things only making sense right now… don’t you get it? And why are you getting married in the first place? Because your parents want you to? for the company? for the future? Are you even happy…?”

It made perfect sense in my mind: I got in an accident. Taeyeon’s parents find out about it first and used this opportunity. They had enough of money to fake it all. Who knows, maybe they even had a letter prepared just in case. They fooled both Taeyeon and me.

“Haven’t you ever considered that maybe…?” I couldn’t finish my sentence. I think I was so concentrated on revealing the truth, that finally made sense to me, that I haven’t noticed Tae’s expression.

I managed to catch the girl at the last moment as she fainted. I should have payed more attention that something was off. She was too tired… too stressed…

“Taengoo?”

 

xxx

 

Three days later I found myself in the hospital. Ironically that same hospital that I spend so much time in the past. Of course I happened to end up here for a completely different reason. This time it was Taengoo related. She was exhausted and needed hospitalization, they even wondered what would have happened if I hadn’t been in her apartment when I was.

Other part of her exhaustion was stress and I guess hearing everything what I have told her was the breaking point.

Even with a lot of controversy as you can guess, I mean Tiffany who couldn’t trust me easily, I still managed to stay by Taeyeon’s side all this time. Luckily the girls agreed not to tell her parents. At least for now… and hospital didn’t find it as a necessity too.

A lot of things happened in these couple of days and Yoona used this time to finally have a serious conversation with both Tiffany and Sunny. I heard that the conversation was really long and probably tiring.

The density of people surprise me sometimes. I’m not saying that I’m any better, but no one actually discussing anything for this long… the world is a strange and scary place. It just proves that if you won’t fight for your happiness, no one else will do that for you.

It’s a bit hard to change your mind overnight, so Tiffany still had a little bit of a problem while communicating with me in a civilized manner. She agreed to talk about the past and apologized for the slap, and I realized that I should just give this girl some time. After all, she blamed me for all of Taeyeon’s misfortunes, she found me as the responsible person for everything and she even had a good relationship with Taeyeon’s parents all these years. So it was hard to realize and accept the fact that things happened in a completely different order.

Still Tiffany and Sunny agreed and told me what happened during these years. Taeyeon took our ‘break up’ that didn’t even happened, really bad. She had depression for few years. She traveled whenever she could without staying in one place for long, to put in simply: she just wanted to get lost. There were times when Taeyeon even left her friends worried if she’s still alive and kicking as no news came from her for months.

Few years ago she came back with somehow controlled feelings and concentrated on her work. Taengoo became a workaholic since most of the time she spend nights at work, simply getting lost in all of those papers rather than having to deal with other people.

She stopped believing in love that’s why even this whole arrangement to get married for the well being of her company and for the happiness of her parents didn’t sound like a bad idea.

The Taengoo that I remember would have never agreed to get married with someone whom she didn’t love.

This helped me realize that I wasn’t the only one who had it bad. Who was confused, hurt… all was left to do is talk with her… wait for Taengoo to wake up…for as long as it takes… with hope that she believes me, with hope that she loves me the same way that I do love her, with hope that she still wants to be with, with hope that she will tell me that it’s not the end of our love.

 

xxx

“Hello, yes, I do remember you. You were my patient back then, right? Well not mine… I was just a nurse… I’m a doctor now”

I nod my head remembering this girl. She was there when I woke up. I looked down at her name tag, doctor Choi Sooyoung. Yes, the name sounds familiar.

“Yes, you did take good care of me. Thank you for that… and for this… you were the one who agreed that we don’t need to call every single person Taeyeon knows, so it is not necessary for her parents to show up, right?”

“You’re all grown ups, so yes, I didn’t think that’s necessary. Also, it looks like she’s in good hands. She should wake up soon enough.”

I nod my head feeling both thankful and nervous unsure what else to say. After doctor Choi left I sat down in my usual spot next to Taengoo’s bed and looked at her sleeping face.

So calm and peaceful… as beautiful as I remembered. Even more beautiful with years…

Surprisingly, she opened her eyes pretty much at the same moment when doctor Choi closed doors after herself. At first, looking at the ceiling, and then slowly turning her eyes in my direction.

I tried to form a smile. Apologetic one. I think it turn out to be a nervous one but that’s all I managed to do for the time being.

“Hey…” I whispered nervously while readjusting a strand of Taengoo’s hair. “You’re up… do you… feel rested? At least… a little bit…?”

She kept her gaze on me while I still couldn’t take my hand away. Having an opportunity to touch her skin even for a short while, I couldn’t stop myself for using this chance.

“Water?”

She cough and there is no surprise as she hadn’t spoken for three days just laying in bed. I felt a bit disappointed that I need to take my hand away, but of course I rushed to give her the water she asked for. I helped Taeyeon out with drinking it and can see how her face looked more lively afterwards.

“You had to stay in a hospital for few more days because you were exhausted and needed recovery… I know you’re not a fan of hospitals but… that was the only possible outcome.”

Taengoo nod her head slowly “you stayed…in here?” asking carefully.

I gathered my thoughts realizing that she probably have heard my short interaction with doctor Choi, so I nod my head with confirmation.

“Not in this exact bed… but yeah… I had spend some time in here…”

“That’s not some time… that’s a whole year…”

Taeyeon commented sadly turning her eyes away from mine and staring at the ceiling. I wish I could read what she was thinking, I can only guess… but I want to know for real.

“TAEYEON! I HAVE JUST HEARD ABOUT THIS!” I turn to look at the door as tall, dark haired guy ran inside with worry written all over his face. So that must be the…groom.

He ignored my existence going straight to the love of my life.

“You got me so worried when I have heard about it!”

Taeyeon looked at him smiling apologetically, and answering really quietly. I could barely make out the words she used “sorry… that really… didn’t include my plans…”

All I could feel was jealousy. How long this guy stayed by her side when I was away? Does he mean anything to Taeyeon? What if all of a sudden she realized that she’s developing feelings for him and they are in a serious relationship… what if earlier Taeyeon got angry when I showed up because she actually wanted this wedding to happen… what if…

“Excuse me… maybe you could leave us alone for at least couple of minutes?” he looked in my direction smiling politely. Like I’m some bug flying around and disturbing his love nest. Are you kidding me?

I nod my head obediently “yes… of course”.

Before leaving I looked at Taeyeon for one more time, but she averted her eyes avoiding my gaze. Should I take this as a bad sign? I have no other choice just to walk out and wait outside.

I’m not even sure what I’m even waiting for…

 

xxx

It would have been foolish of me to stand outside the door and try to listen what they are talking about, that thought crossed my mind but I probably wouldn’t have heard anything as Tae’s bed was far away from the door and I doubt they intent to scream.

I know… I haven’t forgotten that Sunny told me that Taengoo is not happy but what if she is…what if those six years that haven’t changed anything for me… that haven’t changed my feelings at all… not only scattered Taeyeon’s world but changed her dreams and hopes as well. Changed her love…

I couldn’t stop myself from panicking. That’s all I did. I’m not sure how long those two even talked… did they agree to change the date of the wedding because of Taeyeon’s exhaustion? Did they confess to each other that they can’t live without one another? Did they… no… I don’t want to imagine anything else.

Finally, probably after at least 10 minutes that guy (I don’t know his name because all Yoona told me was that it starts with B…) walked out looking for me. I didn’t notice hate or blame… maybe Taeyeon did chose him? Maybe he doesn’t even know about my existence and about our past?

“You can go back in,” that’s all he told me and walked away.

Confused I walked inside trying to smile in the same manner like before. I walked back to the same spot I stood earlier, staring back at Taeyeon who didn’t turn her eyes away from me the moment I walked in.

All of a sudden, I can see tears filling up in her eyes.

Wait… no…

I soon leaned in catching them with my fingers and spoke up with worry “no no…it is okay… I understand… if you forgot about me… if you don’t love me anymore… if all of this is too much… if it has been too long… I understand… I just… I want you to be happy…” I could feel myself tearing up as well. That’s what to expect in this situation I guess.

I’m close to giving up my love… if I have to leave Seoul again and never come back for the sake of you…my love… I will…now when I know everything that happened in the past…I just want to see you happy… even if the person who makes you happy is not me…

“So it’s okay… you can ask me anything… I understand…I’m sorry if this disturbed you…changed your plans or…”

“Y-you…should be angry,” Taengoo commented surprised with tears still streaming down her beautiful face.

“What? Why?”

“I WASN’T THERE! YOU LAY IN A HOSPITAL BED AND I WASN’T THERE! YOU SHOULD HATE ME. HATE ME!”

“Stop… Taengoo… I don’t blame you for anything. Why are you blaming yourself?”

“I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN! I SHOULD HAVE GUESSED! Instead of getting hurt and running away… I should have search more… find Yoona and get a confirmation of that letter… I believed it so easily… HATE ME!”

“I could never hate you… you’re the only one I love,” I whispered while leaning closer.

Taeyeon also kept on whispering and repeating that I should hate her and because of that I captured her lips with mine.

I put everything into this kiss. All the hurt, all the mistakes, all the stupidity that can be applied for both of us. Maybe that’s the last kiss I’m going to have… I need to give my all if that’s the case.

We had to separate for air and Taeyeon spoke up again “I left him but…”

“You did?”

I instantly asked hopefully.

“He can find another love, we only had an agreement… this wouldn’t have been real even if we got married… I let him search for the love he deserves… but…”

“But…?”

“I don’t deserve you…”

I laughed with relief, I couldn’t stop myself. Even with both of us crying like kindergarten kids, all of a sudden I see my future a lot brighter.

“I love you you… do you still love me? That’s all that I care about…”

“Of course I do, princess! But…”

Princess (not even Sica) and most importantly not Jessica. I’m hearing the nickname that annoyed me sometimes in the past but from Taengoo’s lips it’s like the biggest confirmation of her love.

I didn’t let her finish and kissed Taeyeon again with passion. She answered my kisses putting even more pressure into them.

Between those kisses as we missed each other lips so much I commented truthfully “we will figure all of this out… just tell me that you want to be with me… just tell me it’s not the end and we will figure absolutely everything out…with time… with patience… with everything… I love you, Taengoo… you know… I still have that proposal ring.”

Taeyeon looked at me with pure love and surprise. “You…do?”

To prove my point I take it out from my purse. All these years I kept in by my side. Not on my finger but somewhere close by…

“Should I put it back on or…?”

“No…”

“No?”

“No… you should give it back to me…”

“Wait…why?”

Taeyeon put her hand in front of herself smiling shortly. I can see sparks in her eyes. “I want to give it to you again some time in the future so…”

I didn’t realize I have held my breath for few seconds thinking that Taeyeon wants to end everything with me for good.

“What no… it is mine forever… you made your choice… learn to live with it!”

I showed her my tongue playfully, but then noticed that even though she laughed, she still seemed worried.

“Mmm… what are going to do…with your parents and…”

“You know I won’t leave them behind… they gave birth to me…they do love me… even in such manner…but maybe we can punish them a little… spending Christmas and New Year with friends… visiting them rarely in comparison with the past… though…well most likely… just spending Christmas with our friends instead of my parents…”

I laughed with relief and stole one more kiss from Taeyeon. I don’t know since when I became such a kissing monster but I just can’t help myself or control it anymore.

“I love this idea very much…”

I hold her face with both of my hands inches away from her eyes, her lips, her nose… my Taengoo…

“I’m so happy right now…but you still haven’t answered about this ring situation…”

Knowing what I want to hear Taeyeon ended my thought “It is yours, just like I am yours… but…”

Another but?

“But?”

“Maybe we should try elope next time.” She smiled cheekily at the comment and I had to laugh at that.

I kissed her one more time, happy that I come back, since there is no one else that could replace Taeyeon’s place in my heart and these years of distance showed that it is the same for her too.

 

[THE END]

 

 

 

 

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Irreplaceable [1/2]

Pairing: Taeyeon/Jessica.

G; nothing is easy in love, but the saddest thing is when you lose it, especially if you had never imagined your life without that other person. There are times when other people get in between and ruin it, unknowingly to the two who are in love. This story concentrates on a painful break up (that probably shouldn’t even count as one) of Taeyeon and Jessica, and a second chance 6 years later.

 


 

PART 1

The airport is almost empty at 4 am in the morning. That’s how I prefer it because it leaves a lot of time to gather my thoughts. My thoughts that has been scattered since two days ago after Yoona’s call. You’re getting married. I guess for real this time… no more complications. No one getting in between.

I still remember waking up in a hospital bed with no one around. Just an empty room and all I could hear was my own beating heart. The last thing I remembered was rushing to our wedding ceremony. I was so happy and so in love. I always believed you felt the same. I put my trust in you. But I woke up alone. Next day visitors kept coming in and checking on my condition but none of them were you.

Yoona told me that you left the country two days after our marriage ceremony. Our wedding. A wedding that didn’t happen because I got in an accident.

I didn’t want to believe that you just left me and I tried searching for you. Asking friends, relatives, even your parents where you could be. No one told me that. Either they didn’t know or they didn’t want to tell me.

I guess that’s something I could have expected from your parents. They have never liked me. Surprisingly, the reason wasn’t the fact that I am a girl. They have always wished that you could marry your childhood friend Tiffany but I got in the way. That’s something they never forgave me for.

I knew that you were back in Seoul for some time now. Only after learning that you came back to get married…in the same place where we were suppose to share our vows and promise to stay together forever…I couldn’t just sit and wait.

I have no intention of interrupting your marriage. Despite everything I wish you happiness. I just want to know why…why haven’t you stayed by my side? Why you went away? Why you didn’t care?

xxx

I notice someone waving at me from across the airport. I told Yoona I don’t need escort from the airport but she still came.

“Jessica! Finally! I haven’t seen you in ages!” the girl literally jumped on me and it was a miracle that I managed to stand my ground.

“Let’s go see the city! No no… let’s go to our favorite places first…no wait… maybe we could eat somewhere first! Oh…I have so much on my mind! You probably forgot how Seoul looks! Let me show you everything!”

I laughed shortly “breathe…” and after that added more seriously. “I need to take care of something first…and then we can do whatever you like… I plan on staying for at least a couple of weeks”.

“Take care of something…you mean?”

“Yes…I need to know why… just a simple question… I think it is better to ask now. I don’t want to regret that I didn’t for the rest of my life. I need to know… maybe then I can move on.”

“You should have moved on long time ago! Wait how much time passed? About six years, right? You should have moved on at least five years ago… no wait you were still in a coma at that time… well at least four years ago!”

We headed out of the airport and I liked the support of Yoona, so I forced myself to keep on smiling. The girl kept on rambling about my moving on while I got lost in my thoughts again. How long it take Taengoo to move on? I shouldn’t call her that anymore…just Taeyeon…”

Taeyeon parents weren’t good actors and I could see that they were happy that we’re through when I tried searching for her and asked them where she could be. They were overjoyed. I wouldn’t be surprised if the one that’s Taeyeon is getting married to is Tiffany. That would be their preference, after all. Wait… maybe Yoona knows about this as well. After all, she somehow found out about the wedding.

“Eh…Yoong? Who’s Taeyeon is getting married to?”

My friend scowled at me “I keep telling you that you should move on and forget about her and you asked me this out of the blue? Were you even listening to what I am saying? Of course not… who am I fooling here… who knows…some guy… Barry, Baek? I don’t remember his name but he’s not someone that we know. I wouldn’t be surprised if the marriage is calculated as it would be beneficial for both of their companies… also Taeyeon’s parents approve of him if that’s what you’re curious about.”

“Of course they do”, I sigh defeated “anyone is better than me… but wait… why not Tiffany? I remember how her parents always said that they would be the happiest if Hwang were in my place instead… so Taeyeon likes guys now or what? I remember she once told me that I’m the only she sees.”

I realize that I said this bitterly but my mind is still clouded for all the information. I’m allowed to be angry. I have noticed that Yoong avoided my eyes from some time. But with my intense staring I won her over.

“Fany was the one who told me about the wedding because she’s the bridesmaid… just like in your wedding… well if you two had gotten married… you know I haven’t kept in touch with them and we started communicating only recently. The girls don’t even know that I told you about it…”

“I don’t even know what’s on their minds because they haven’t asked about you even once… I wish I could have come to the church that day so I would have at least seen what was happening there while you were in the hospital… Also Fany is actually taken. She got together with Sunny four years ago. I guess only Tae’s parents wished for them to be a thing”.

“I see…” it hurt knowing that Taeyeon never asked about me. Not even once. Did I meant so little to her?

“Do you know where I can find her?”

“Who? Tiffany?”

“Sunny… I haven’t talked with her for years…but I think she would tell me where I can find Taeyeon. We were good friends some time ago…also she should understand my reasons.”

Yoona seemed doubtful about it. “You know she changed a little…well she’s running after Tiffany like she’s a god now. Maybe I should ask… I will say that I can’t find Taeng but I need to give her something… I will think of an excuse. If you do that… she might just call Taeyeon herself and tell her that you’re back.”

Giving a second thought that was way better option so I had to agree. Ten minutes later we were sitting in the backseat of taxi and Yoona was already calling Sunny. Just like she guessed she got the answer quite immediately, though even I could hear Sunny’s discontent. I looked at the clock. 5 am. We should have probably discussed the time for the call.

Yoona told me that when Sunny talked with Taeyeon last time she mentioned that she plans on spending her Sunday at home so I had more than enough time to get a shower and get ready for the talk.

xxx

I stood in front of Taeyeon’s apartment around 9 am. I knew that she might be sleepy because she has always used her free days for extra sleep. Her logic told her that this way she gets all the hours of sleep that are necessary for humans thought obviously all the articles on the Internet told otherwise.

With trembling hand I knocked on the door and stood there waiting. I noticed that she doesn’t have peephole on her doors. That’s an advantage as she might just ignore me and leave me standing here. That’s not Taeyeon’s style… but she wasn’t there when I needed her the most. Why I am still making excuses for her?

I waited for about two minutes and knocked again. I counted the numbers in my mind to know how much time passed. That’s how pathetic I was.

The door on full swing caught me off guard. Now I realized the reason why it took Taeyeon some time since she stood there just in her towel, clutching it with one hand. Her hair was still wet and some drops of water were falling on the her shoulders and floor.

“What do you want?” Taeyeon asked before seeing who’s behind the door. The second her eyes landed on me she unconsciously gasped and before I could open my mouth shut the door in front of me.

I think I heard some voices inside the apartment but I couldn’t be sure. During these few seconds I only managed to see her face. The same face that I remembered and still dreamed about every night… It finally hit me how much I actually missed her. How irreplaceable she is for me.

I was about to knock again not ready to give up but before I could do that Taeyeon opened the doors herself. This time I managed to form a faint smile and said short “hello” while waiting for some reaction from the shorter girl.

It took her few more seconds to speak up “what do you want?” she repeated the question a bit annoyed but I could see curiosity behind those expressive eyes too. Some time ago… I knew them so well… could they lie to me? They never did before.

“Can I… come in? Can we talk?” I asked politely not sure how to start this conversation. I felt that Taeyeon is the one who should give me an explanation but for some reason standing right in front of her I feel petrified and can’t start demanding things. That’s not how I planned to have this conversation in my mind.

Believe me I imagined this scene way too many times. How I would speak my mind and made her listen. How I demand Taeyeon to explain her reasons… how she will apologize and we get back together… of course… that was only a dream.

“If you’re busy with someone else I can meet you any other day,” I added bitterly remembering the voices from inside the apartment.

I expected her to agree to this term but instead Taeyeon stood aside and let me in “that’s just my TV,” she commented simply while closing the door and rushing to the other room to turn it off. When she got back all I could hear was silence.

She looked at me expectantly. So yeah… I’m the one who needs to speak. Fine. I can speak. I have a lot to say.
I opened my mouth but nothing came up. I just stood there staring at her. Her figure that looked just I remember, her brown expressive eyes that always betrayed her little lies, her lips who shared the most beautiful smiles with me, the same lips that I couldn’t stop kissing and never got tired of.

I don’t think I was in my right mind when I stepped closer to her, cupping Taeyeon’s cheeks and capturing her lips. I have expected her to push me away as she froze under my touch but instead I felt her answering the kiss. She even pulling me closer. Few seconds later she bit my lip and not in a playful way.

This reminded me of situation and made me retreat from the kiss. I still felt her lips on mine. It felt like all my senses were coming back to me right this moment. Her smell invaded my nose. Her furious fuming, red and angry face caught my complete attention.

“What are you doing, Jessica? Do you think you can just get back from…who knows where and do this?”
Taeyeon… she rarely called me just by my name. But wait… what is she talking about.

“What do you mean?” I questioned confused why I am the one who’s being blamed for something.

“I’m talking about the fact that you have no right to do this to me again! You ran away from our wedding and what… now you found out that I’m getting married and decided to play more? I’m having none of it!” with unreasonable amount of strength Taeyeon pushed me through the door.

Before Taeyeon smashed the door into my face I noticed her eyes full of tears “I don’t need another break up letter from you!” with that I had to back out or the strength of the door would have broken my nose.

I stood few more seconds trying to gather my thoughts and understand what Taengoo was talking about. My Taengoo who kissed with the same passion like before… my Taengoo who cried when she saw me… I want to scream in frustration so someone…anyone would tell me what her words means! I have never written any letter to her…especially not a break up letter. What the hell? Why instead of getting answers after coming here I got even more questions?

From the last stare Taengoo gave me I doubt she going to tell me anything. But I need to ask around…someone will know what all of this means.

xxx

I met up with Yoong next morning because my curios friend wanted to know everything that happened the day before. I barely slept so my condition couldn’t be described as a good one. Still… I decided that there’s no point staying in bed and hiding from the reality of life.

“I’m so confused… Taengoo…I mean… Taeyeon blamed me for everything from the second she laid her eyes on me…well no… at first she slammed the doors and I thought that she might just leave me hanging.”

“And then?” Yoong seemed unusually calm about the situation. As if she was trying on purpose to control her usual vitality.

“Well… we talked a bit… well no… I stole a kiss and then we walked a bit…”

“You did WHAT?” yes, there is my friend. “Are you insane? You haven’t seen each other for six years and the first thing you do is steal a kiss? Are you retarded?”

“Eh…it kind of happened I didn’t plan it, you know!” I pouted because of the scowl and added “also… don’t you want to hear the full situation… not just beginning of it?”

Yoona eyed me as if I was really insane but nod encouraging me to continue. I told my best friend everything that happened in Taeyeon’s apartment and waited for some comments, even if she scowls at me again. It is better than that silence treatment that she’s now giving me.

Apparently I interpreted Yoona’s silence as a bad thing but the girl surprised me with a sudden comment.

“Maybe… I’m against it… but maybe you should try talk with Fany and Sunny…Tiffany might try to kill you… but there’s some hope that Sunny would tell you something if you convince her that you truly don’t know what is happening.”

“Maybe… Maybe I should try…”

xxx

I waited for a day knowing that Yoong arranged the meeting and drove to Sunny’home. I don’t know about her and Tiffany relationship status, but they are living together so it must be serious. I knock on their front door nervously and let out a breath I have been holding when Sunny was the one opening the doors.

“Oh…hi,” she greeted me awkwardly while letting me in. I think I heard her whisper “I’m sorry if Fany…” but she didn’t get a change to finish the sentence as Tiffany came from their kitchen.

“You have already ruin a perfect morning… so just tell us what you want and leave. I hope you can fled the city like before. The sooner – the better.”

I bit my lip unsure how to start the conversation (it was unusual for me to react this way. Any other day I would have had a good comeback for Tiffany’s rude comment, but confusion somehow clouded my mind.) Luckily Sunny nod her head encouraging me.

“I’m…I have met with Taeyeon few days ago…”

Tiffany raised her hand while pointing in my direction accusingly “See Sunny! I told you… who else could leave Taeyeon such a mess! Of course it had to be you,” she added through gritted teeth and I had to step back a bit.

I have always had somewhat decent relationship with Tiffany. We barely spend time together, I could probably count those times on my fingers and also all of them were with either Taengoo or Sunny. Surprisingly these two weren’t even together back then. To put it simple, we were neither friends nor enemies, it worked out for us that way. This hostility though came out of nowhere.

I tried to forget Tiffany’s accusation for a moment and concentrated on my reason coming here. ” I know you lost contact with Yoong and there is a lot that she can’t tell me. The thing is… I need to find out what had happened.”

“You left my best friend at the altar waiting for you. That’s what happened.”

“Well yes…obviously I couldn’t come because of my…”

I didn’t get to finish when unexpectedly Tiffany slapped me. “Really? You talk so freely about it? Just leave. Taeyeon is happy and she doesn’t need you anymore. If I have to see her as hurt as she has been back then…I will haunt you down.”

Tiffany stopped her threatening stance when she heard microwave in the kitchen. “When I get back…I don’t want to see this one in my home.”

She immediately turn around and walked out leaving me speechless. I turn to look at Sunny who scratched her head and smiled apologetically “I told Yoona that there is only one way this conversation could go… but I also made a promise… she said that it is literally the last thing she’s going to ask from me… so here.”

Sunny extended her hand with a key in it.

“Is that…what I think it is?”

“Yoona probably has some sort of plan… I think it is best if you discuss it with her.”

Sunny looked at the direction of kitchen with a wonder “I think you should go…Tiffany might come back with a knife.”

I looked at the girl wide eyed. I knew that Tiffany had a temper when it came to certain things so it is better not to risk it. I took the key rushing to their front door but still… I had to ask… to get a confirmation so I can either move on or maybe…fight for my one true love.

“Is…she really happy?”

I should have asked Sunny this earlier because she already rushed me outside when Tiffany came back to the room. Before closing the doors she looked at me wondering for a second, she didn’t say anything but shook her head.

I got an answer that made my heart flutter with hope… Taengoo…I’m going to figure out what all of this means. This can’t be the end of our story.
I had been back home for almost five days now. I met few of my classmates that we lost touch through the years, and once evening Yoona forced me to have dinner with her and SeoHyun (as if I haven’t know the girl). Of course… I haven’t seen Hyun for a long time, but I have always remembered how she ran away from my ‘crazy in love’ best friend.

I think Seohyun even moved to a different country running away from her stalker…but guess what, Yoong didn’t waste her time and moved right after her.

Surprisingly all this creepiness payed off, Seohyun agreed to go out with her and realized that she might as well fall for older (but less mature) girl.

They have been together ever since, I knew this because Yoong called me telling all the details of their relationship. It creeps me out how much I knew but tried not to show it or Seohyun might as well try to run away from my friend again.

Honestly, there meeting were good distractions but no matter what I did… Taeyeon stayed on my mind…and in my heart.

xxx

Yoong told me that we need to be cautious and wait until Taeyeon leaves for work. She has also shared that crazy idea of breaking into her apartment and searching for that letter… letter that ruined our past and that I wasn’t even aware that existed.

We could go to jail for breaking in… but what else is there to do… Taeyeon hasn’t tried to speak with me again, Tiffany would probably run me down with a car if I try to get in contact with Sunny again… and I’m definitely not going to meet Taeyeon’s parents again. They don’t care about my misery.

We agreed that Yoona will be on the look out, she mentioned that there might be a chance that Taeyeon burn or thrown my letter away or maybe it doesn’t even exist and she just told me about it just to mess with my head, but I knew my Taengoo too well…

She wouldn’t have throw it away… she would have kept it and read it repeatedly trying to convince herself that what is written is true. I have just hoped that I can find her hiding place.

xxx

The big day come and I was looking around the apartment. Yoona agreed to text me if she sees something suspicious and because we went quite early… I had hope to end this mission successfully.

Look at me acting like a child. But ask yourself… what would you do if your world turn upside down just like that.

After an hour of aimless search and Yoong texting me randomly out of boredom, I was close to giving up until I noticed Taeyeon perv section. I will let your imagination ruin wild what kind of things there were… would she leave it inside something like this? I had to check.

YES! I was close to tearing up for finding that letter. As I guessed it has been used many. It instantly caught my attention ‘Dear Taengoo’… was written down on the envelope.

I was taken back a bit realizing that it definitely resembles my handwriting. It is not an exact 100% match… but even I would have believed that these are my thoughts.

Too much of a coincidence, if I might add.

My hands were shaking but I couldn’t wait any longer. I looked inside to read everything that has been written. Unconsciously tears started falling down my cheeks.

xxx

Dear Taengoo,

I have been thinking about this for so long… I couldn’t say when my doubts started… were they before you proposed to me or after…

But they always stayed in my head… torturing me…

It is all my fault, for waiting so long… for not expressing them out loud… for leading you on…

I’m choosing the worst possible moment to say this… but if not now…when?

I would only make it harder if I come today… I don’t want a scene where I burst into tears while standing next to you at the altar and ran out like in some drama…

I also realize it is unfair to you no matter what I do. Especially when you stayed by my side…fought for this love.

Everyone around us kept telling you that at some point I will give up, but you were so determined to make me yours… with your pervert comments and cuddles.

You kept telling me how beautiful and special I am…and I guess… I just didn’t want to lose any of that. I got spoiled by your attention and hide my true feelings somewhere deep inside.

I realize now… maybe I DO love you… but it is not the same thing you feel for me.

I’m so sorry Taengoo! But you have time now… time to find the one for yourself! Your true love! Time to move on from an idiot like me!

I wish to see you happy… but it is better for me to disappear… If I stayed near it would only hurt you more.

This is a goodbye… please don’t hate me.

xxx

 
What the hell have I just read? It sounded like me… that’s the worst part. Not the point about our love…my love for Taengoo… but everything else… gosh… everyone saw that I was freaking out and even expressed uncertainty about our wedding back then.

What bride wouldn’t panic before her wedding, though? I need to think… there has to be a clue or something…

I was about to read it again and torture myself even more if I haven’t heard familiar-confused voice.

“What…what are you doing here?” Taeyeon asked while unconscionably dropping down her keys.

I Don’t Like You – [Extra #2]

DRUNK TAENG

[First sip]

Taeyeon took the beer that Sunny gave her, but she didn’t forget to squint her eyes and show suspiciousness. Sunny buying her a drink without any reason was unusual. Taeyeon didn’t even try to hide it from her face.

“Oh come on, Taeng… I invited Yoona to join us too… not sure where she is though… but she should soon be here. I will buy a drink for her too.”

“Yeah… but it is unlikely behavior of yours… You don’t usually waste your money on us. You’re really stingy.”

“Hey! I am not!”

“Yes you are!”

“Am not!”

“Yes!”

“No!”

“Oh hey, Yoong!” Taeyeon waved to younger girl that finally showed up and practically ran to her unnies with apologetic smile on her face. “Sorry, I’m late guys. Traffic… oh… you already started drinking?”

“Not quite. You should order too. Sunny is buying.”

“Cool!” Yoona smiled brightly. Spending other people money did sound more pleasant that spending your own. “Can I order some food too?”

“If you order it, then pay for it yourself. I’m only buying drinks.”

“HA!” Taeyeon pointed at Sunny triumphantly “Point proven!”

xxx

[Third Sip]

All three girls were drinking and enjoying their time in quite calm bar. It was closest to their job and surprisingly the whole action here started only around 2AM. They came around 10PM, so it meant that they should either way for 4 hours, or Sunny’s plan was simple = there is no need for party. The point is to get Taeyeon drunk and hear older girl reasons for disliking Seohyun.

It didn’t work well though. Sunny was as per usual drinking way more than those two combined and didn’t even feel the effects, Yoona ordered a lot of food (yes, she sacrificed her own money because of Sunny’s stinginess) and ate more than drank. Taeyeon didn’t rush either. She knew her limit.

Of course… Sunny had some tricks on her sleeve, distracting Taeyeon meant she will stop counting those sips and will let loose. So Sunny started telling the most annoying things that she had to deal with through this month and when you hear something for a third time – you do need to take a drink to keep yourself calm and don’t shout at your friend to ‘shut up.’

Sunny’s evil plan started working. Taeyeon did forget how much she had drank and started concentrating on alcohol instead of her voice.

xxx

[Taeyeon’s first bottle (almost finished), Yoona’s (food = done, second bottle started), Sunny’s = 5th bottle finished).]

“Taeyeon who are you texting? I don’t think you are actually writing something… you are just pressing random buttons, aren’t you?”

Taeyeon blushed against her own will and snickered loudly (probably believing that she’s very quiet and subtle) “No one.”

Sunny sighed deciding that maybe it could be a good chance to finally ask the most important question of this evening. “So… mmm… can I ask you something, Tae?”

“No.”

“Come on. Just one question. I promise. I will keep my mouth shut after that.”

Taeyeon looked up from her phone, considering it. “Wait a sec…” and send two new messages. The ones who Seohyun later on did read out loud for her unnies:

“Sunny is annoying!”

“Drunk she is.”

“Ask.”

Yoona lay her head on the table dramatically and sighed “I’m so lonely… aren’t you lonely, Tae? I want to be in love… in a relationship… and all that other annoying but at the same time exciting stuff…”

Taeyeon shrugged her shoulders confused “Maybe. I’m not sure. I… probably? I don’t know… do I?” Taeyeon started questioning herself with pure and honest curiosity. The expressions on her face changed so often that it looked a bit funny and resembled confused child. “Yeah… I’m too…”

Of course, sober and stubborn Taeyeon would have never confessed this out loud and Sunny realized that there won’t be more perfect change to ask away. “Okay, my question now.”

“I already answered.”

“What??? Yoona just… randomly spoke about… seriously?” Sunny couldn’t even form words to express her irritation.

Taeyeon nod stubbornly and pouted “You said one question. You didn’t say which one of you ask me…”

“True… she’s not lying… that’s true.” Yoona agreed also pouting and looking at Sunny as if she’s the bad guy. Unfortunately, drunk Yoona completely forgot about their plan for the night.

Sunny faced palm herself. “Great.”

xxx

[Taeyeon = first bottle finished, Yoona = second bottle finished – third bottle started, Sunny = 7th bottle started.]

Taeyeon fall asleep, on the table, face down in her own phone that probably for some time still kept on sending some weird not making any sense messages.

Yoona kept on continuing that ‘feeling lonely’ topic and tried to get some sort of reaction and answer out of Sunny, pouting most of the time, even using Aegyo which made Sunny cringe.

Sunny curses everyone in her head and silently thanked that thing like alcohol exists in this world or she might end up killing these two losers.

And the rest is history…

I Don’t Like You – [Extra #1]

INTERVENTION

“We need to do this together, you can’t leave me alone in this!” Sunny protested while glaring at Yoona. This all happened before Sunny’s brilliant plan to get Taeyeon drunk, so obviously it was also before the embarrassing messages that Tae left for Seohyun, and before Yoona and Sunny make out in the corridor, behind Taeyeon’s doors.

Yoona sighed, clearly annoyed “Fine…” but then “will you buy me food afterwards if I help you?”

“Do you want me to fight you again?”

Yoona laughed out loud after this pointless threat “You do know people call me him Yoona  for a reason? If I wanted to… I could just…”

Sunny crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows “really? I think I’m pretty strong too. Do you want to fight me and figure it out?”

The two stood in front of each other quite comically, and it might actually ended in a fight for dominance if not Seohyun “Hey, Sunny unnie…I got your message, what’s the matter?”

“Good! We are all here! Let’s discuss it, since it is REALLY important! We can’t mess up!” Hearing this Yoona looked at Sunny strangely, as if shorter girl is actually crazy if she considers it a serious matter, while Seohyun showed her respect and concentration, eager to hear what her unnie has in mind.

xxx

It was a quiet day. Nothing much happened during it, so it was a rare chance for Taeyeon to enjoy her time alone. Away from Seohyun (since the girl even visited her at home with that damn chicken soup) and Sunny (or Yoona, since lately those two spend most of their time together, with their pointless and crazy conversations.)

So to commemorate this quiet day, Taeyeon used earphones, listened to music, and read a book that another co-worker recommended to her about two years ago. Yes, it took literally this much time for Taeyeon to actually listen to the suggestion.

The day went quite well, but she should have known. Things are never as good as they seem. She got the confirmation when Sunny stole her earphones away, and she noticed three girls standing in front of her. Determined, crazy looking – Sunny, a bit passive but curious – Yoona, and somewhat awkward about the things that were happening – Seohyun.

“We got to talk!” Sunny crossed her arms and showed that she means business.

“Why do people value others’ time so little? Now we would have the inevitable small talk. I could have spent fifteen minutes at home practicing aikido.”

“Aikido? What the hell are you talking about? Look at yourself! You’re A4! Paper weight!”

Taeyeon closed the book and sighed “I just read the quote from this book. It does make sense with all that small talk… can you just go straight to business so I can enjoy the rest of my day?”

The whole quote from the book took Sunny off guard, and she punched Yoona lightly, while whispering “speak!”

“Why me? That was your idea!” Yoona whined instead of doing what she’s told, while Taeyeon sighed getting a bit impatient.

“Fine. If not me – you won’t achieve anything people. So… I won’t beat around the bush and just say it.. because you want to hear it straight away… the thing is… this is intervention.”

“Intervention?”

“Intervention is the action or process of intervening. An intervention is the act of inserting one thing between others, like a person trying to help. Intervention comes from the Latin intervenire, meaning “to come between, interrupt.” Seohyun answered as if reciting some dictionary.

“Hyun not now!” Sunny sighed, realizing that she’s the boss here. Yoona wasn’t helpful, and the best Seohyun could do is explain the meaning of certain words. They all knew what  it meant either way.

“The thing is… people keep talking… and we’re getting concerned… do you really have no idea what I’m talking about Taeyeon?”

Taeyeon shook her head.

“You sure? Not even the slightest clue?”

Once again, Taeyeon repeated the previous action, getting a bit impatient. She wasn’t the only one, all of them heard Yoona’s stomach growl quite loudly. The girl just ate her lunch and she was hungry all over again.

“The thing is… well.. I will just… say it… get over it… the thing is…”

“Soonkyu, please just say what you have in mind. Yoona will die from hunger if you keep on going!”

“FINE! Fine… okay… so the thing is…” Sunny closer her eyes and embraced herself for what’s coming next.

“The thing… you need to stop using FANTASTIC BABY as your answer all the time. You’re scaring our co-workers and interns…”

“Are you all serious right now?” Taeyeon looked at three girls standing in front of them, and they all nod simultaneously.

“Omg… I can’t believe you interrupted my – me time- for this…” she shook her head, not hiding her irritation and opened her book once again.

“So… will you stop, Taeyeon unnie?” Seohyun asked carefully, unsure what to do or say next. Truth be told, Seohyun wasn’t even sure why Sunny decided to invite her to this little intervention thing.

Taeyeon sighed. It wasn’t that easy to pretend that she doesn’t see them standing in front of her. “Fine. I will stop using it if the three of you will leave me alone at this instance.”

She didn’t need to repeat herself twice – Seohyun, Yoona and Sunny instantly turn around and ran away. Taeyeon smirked to herself while taking and putting her earphones in once again.

No surprise here – the song that kept playing on her iphone was indeed Big Bang’s – Fantastic Baby.

I Don’t Like You [Part 6]

Yoona and Sunny were left alone for a moment, though no one really knew how long that moment might actually last.  Taeyeon didn’t think that it is a good idea to leave her two friends work it out. Why? She just thought that foolish and drunk people tend to make trouble, either for themselves or for others. Taeyeon was quite convinced that they wouldn’t even know how to solve it or talk it out like adults do.

There was no way Taeyeon will easily forget this whole incident and Sunny with Yoona knew it.

Oh, they really knew it.

xxx

“I don’t think apologizing will work.”

“You think? I think Taeyeon unnie will just…” Yoona put a finger to her own neck and showed how she’s cutting it, implying that Taeyeon will just end shorter girl.

“Oh! Don’t say it as if you’re not taking part in this! Taeyeon knows that you helped me out! Also, what is she even angry about? Do you think she remembers the messages? Crap… she would be embarrassed… but it is not like Seohyun would let it go… that’s not her style… she will try talk about it… but they should talk it out… are you thinking what I am thinking?”

Yoona squinted her eyes slightly with a deep frown. “No. I can’t read mind.”

“Oh come on! Do you remember how… Irene and Seulgi just started dating and well it interfere with their performances… the bosses and management team weren’t happy about it… they even considered letting those two go from the company, because they were too obvious.”

Instead of answering Yoona just nod her head.

“Well… Seohyun was always the responsible one. Do you remember that time when she got commercial bus license just because management said that the artist might not have an opportunity to travel around since they couldn’t find a reliable driver?”

Nod of a head. Confusion. Squint of eyes.

“So… Seohyun went and talked with Seulgi and Irene… like their senpai and a responsible adult. I don’t know her wording, but now when I think about it… about that same time Taeyeon started showing this animosity against her… am I wrong?”

Shrug of the shoulders. Thoughtful look.

“Wasn’t that what you thought before too? You gave me  ‘I knew it! look.”

“Oh… no no… I tried to send you a signal that I’m already hungry and that it is exhausting,” Yoona touched her stomach and pouted. “But I think it makes sense… you should try talking with Taeyeon about it… well before she actually kills Seohyun or something… she’s so aggressive.”

Sunny nod her head with agreement and started pacing around “true true.”

“Oh by the way…,” all of a sudden Yoona spoke up quite randomly but with a certain level of curiosity “should we be talking about that kiss? That’s why they left us alone.”

“What about it?”

“I don’t know. Do you… like… like remember it… and… like… liked it?”

“Mmm, yeah, sure. Do you?” Sunny asked finally facing younger but at the same time higher girl.

“Well… yes… so?”

“Good. We can continue it after work then,” Sunny commented dismissively “I don’t think we should leave Taeyeon and Seohyun alone for too long. It is too dangerous…let’s head back.” Instinctively Sunny took Yoona’s hand and started dragging younger girl after herself.

“That’s true! They might eat all the food!” Yoona added walking a bit faster with honest worry that could be clearly seen on her face.

“Omg idiot! That’s not the point!” Sunny shook her head with disappointment, but still added under her breath with hope that Yoona didn’t hear it. “You’re lucky since you’re a good kisser.”

Of course, as it happens in most situations, Yoona did hear the whispered part out loud and smirked to herself.

I Don’t Like You [Part 5]

Sunny and Yoona had the third meeting during one week and of course every single one of them involved Taeyeon and Seohyun situation. Even the energetic Yoona was quite tired of wasted efforts and time.

The first brilliant idea of Sunny was that to win against Taeyeon in a computer game – both on computer and telephone (using their favorite apps) but of course… Taeyeon was unbeatable.

The second brilliant idea of Sunny was asking the girl why she dislikes Seohyun that much when she’s really tired either early in the morning or at night. Truth be told, when Taeyeon got really tired she either fall asleep or didn´t talk at all.

The third, oh so brilliant idea of Sunny, was having an intervention. Three of them (Taeyeon, Sunny and Yoona) sat down together in a restaurant, far away from the office. Taeyeon had no idea about their initial plan and agreed to go because she was pretty hungry. The whole intervention ended with Sunny cursing under her breath since she had to pay for food…and there is no surprise that Yoona eats a lot. No exception this time either.

The fourth idea was to suggest never ending supply of Seohyun’s chicken soup and a recipe how to make it on her own. Taeyeon said that she would rather starve.

The last idea, the only one that Sunny still had hope with was getting Taeyeon drunk…and she did succeed with this…

…but of course it didn’t work out the way this midget wanted to.

xxx

It was the morning after. Taeyeon still absent from work, probably sleeping on her coach, unable to reach the bed after all the alcohol assuming. The two culprits: Sunny and Yoona were already at work place but one look at them and you could tell that something was off.

Neither Sunny nor Yoona discussed what happened the other night and they probably exchanged only few words during that whole morning.

Surprisingly, Yoona didn’t even touch the food that was right in front of her eyes and no matter how much you know or how you look at the situation… it is clear evidence that something important happened.

Seohyun only confirmed it when she showed up on time (obviously, the girl was probably late only that one time when Taeyeon nagged her and Yoona) and walked straight to those two.

“Did something happen last night?”

“What do you mean?” Sunny asked innocently. She even tried acting cute. It never really worked with people, unless they barely knew the girl.

“I mean what I am asking. Did something happen? Honestly, it is the first time…ever… that I got text messages for Taeyeon unnie and they were somehow… weird…”

The girl thought for a moment trying to explain what she had in mind. After few seconds of blank staring from both sides Seohyun sigh and took the phone out, reading some of the messages out loud:

“Who likes sweet potatoes more than life? Ha. That’s just… Wait… What?”

“Have you actually cursed? Like on time in your whole life? Accidentally? No? Thought so!”

“Chicken soup! Chicken soup! Chicken soup!”

“CHIIIKEEEN!”

“I’m not sure how to read this one since about ten messages only had random letters that didn’t make sense…”

“I forgot that it is pass 10PM. You sleep are…you..ha.”

“I do not not not not not not like you.”

“Not not…”

“NOT!”

“Are you a witch?”

“Sunny is annoying!”

“Drunk she is.”

“Don’t like you. No no.”

“WTH Sunny and Yo.. are making out! GO AWAY! GET A ROOM!”

“Did I mention…no no… don’t like you no…”

“In the end I had few more similar to this one messages.. and the last one… well I think Taeyeon just fall asleep with her face down on the phone because…” Seohyun turn the device around and showed it to Sunny and Yoona.

The last message look somehow similar to this: arhdhasjhgiuahgkjhasqiwhaasjhkfhdasjfh

Seohyun sigh a bit tiredly and repeated her question in the same manner like the first time “so I’m asking. Did something happen last night? Also… who is Yo? Did you make out with someone or…”

“IT IS YOONA. YOU TWO ARE FUCKING UNBELIEVABLE! DO YOU KNOW THAT I HAVE CCTV IN THE CORRIDOR? NO ONE ONES TO SEE YOU GROPING EACH OTHER IN SO… MANY… WAYS…” Taeyeon appeared just on time, after hearing Seohyun’s words.

She stopped close to three of them and stared at Sunny angrily, as if blaming midget for everything that bad happened in her life. After some time and awkward silence Taeyeon glared at Seohyun too “why aren’t you freaking out about the revelation about your friends?”

Seohyun forgot about the messages for a moment, a bit surprised because of the question and opened her mouth to ask about it, but Taeyeon interrupted her with a straight forward question.

“Aren’t you  homophobic? I remember how two years ago you judged Seulgi’s and Irene’s relationship.”

Truth be told, Seohyun still looked surprised and she didn’t try to hide the confusion from her face, while Yoona and Sunny looked at each other instantly, even forgetting about the whole getting drunk, making out and CCTV situation.

“OH! THAT’S WHY!”

Yoona and Sunny said these words simultaneously and at the moment no one really knew what was happening in this situation. Seohyun was still confused because of accusation, Yoona and Sunny seemed to have some sort of revelation between the two, while Taeyeon still couldn’t erase that sigh of two of her friends making out right outside of her own apartment.

I Don’t Like You [Part 4]

This must be it. That’s how you feel when you die and go to hell for your sins. How else could someone look at this situation: almighty and cold Taeyeon being fed by Seohyun. Chicken soup melting in her mouth. Blocking all her other senses and most importantly – brain cells.

Yes. Taeyeon should have just closed the door. Turned around. Locked herself in a room and pretended that it never happened. She’s not even sick! Well… she’s sick of Seohyun… she’s sick of spending every single day with this girl but… that chicken soup seems to be her weakness.

Taeyeon knew from the start that it is some sort of sorcery. Maybe Seohyun is secretly a witch. Her specialty should be dark magic. How else could she make Taeyeon so defenseless. Eating food given to her like she’s some obedient puppy.

Damn it… who makes such tasty chicken soup. Soup isn’t even suppose to be tasty! Kids eat it when they’re forced by their parents! No one enjoys it that much!

“Mmm… who made this?” Taeyeon asked the question that kept on nagging her all this time, still eating it like ice cream. Let’s face it – Taeyeon eating something in the same manner as she eats ice cream must mean that it a meal you just can’t say no to.

“I made it, unnie. Before coming here, do you like it?”

Taeyeon chocked on her next slurp and pulled back. “No.”

xxx

Yoona embraces Seohyun with a hug “Hey, you!” chirpy as ever, even at early morning.

“Hey, you okay? Slept well?”

“Haven’t slept yet, at all!” Yoona laughed as if that was the best joke ever and pouted at the end. “I probably should… Sunny usually nags at me when I overwork myself.”

“Unnie takes a good care of you, right?”

Yoona just shrugged trying not to think about it. “Well yeah… It is her job, so she doesn’t have a choice.” Younger girls walked to the studio together all smiles and laughs until encountering slightly pissed of Taeyeon.

“Finally decided to show up?”

Taeyeon crossed her arms while squinting her eyes at Seohyun, while Yoona checked the time. “Oh come on, unnie… we are like… one minute late?”

Taeyeon sighed annoyed “I guess it is normal for you, Im Yoona, but Seohyun is never late. So one minute is like her getting into a car accident or something… why are you late?”

“Oh…well my friend Hanna asked me if I could bring her chicken soup and I did that on my way here…”

“Chicken soup?”

“Well, yes… she’s a bit sick, but she can’t miss work so…”

“Do you still have it with you?” Taeyeon asked trying to act as if she didn’t care at all, but her eyes kind of give her interest away.

“No…I kind of left it all with her…” Seohyun answered slightly confused but not taking her eyes away from Taeyeon.

Unconsciously Taeyeon pouted “Oh…”

Since Seohyun was probably the only one who hasn’t seen this side of Taeyeon before, she got a pleasant surprise after witnessing the scene. She couldn’t contain the smile and commented “I could bring it tomorrow, if you…want.”

“What? I don’t care about your chicken soup. No one is asking for it” Taeyeon waved her hand dismissively and turn around trying to hide her embarrassment and disappointment, still unable to forget that soup taste from few days ago. “Let’s go. There are still a lot of thing we need to do today. I don’t appreciate your slacking. Also, you’re late.”

Yoona waited a bit until Taeyeon left and sigh “eh…that midget. I guess I’m lucky she’s not my manager… is that how it usually goes between you two?”

Seohyun shook her head shortly, with still visible small on her lips “no. She usually ignores me.”

Remembering about being late for that one minute Seohyun did feel a little bit guilty so she decided to rush, while Yoona shouted with curiosity “I NEED TO TASTE THAT CHIKCEN SOUP OF YOURS TOO!”

xxx

“I think Seohyun’s chicken soup is magical.”

“What?”

Sunny stopped whatever she was doing and looked at Yoona as if she was crazy. “What are you talking about? Im Yoona, can you stop thinking about food for a couple of minutes?!”

“WHAT? IT IS NOT ABOUT ME?!” Yoona suddenly fired back a bit offended. “For your information, that’s not the only thing I think about. So judgmental…”

Sunny sigh feeling defeat creeping in on her. It was impossible to win arguments with these girls… or maybe she just didn’t bother anymore?

“Just tell me what the hell you’re talking about. It is a busy day… I would rather not hear about food now…”

“Taeyeon started talking with Hyun.”

“What?”

“Yeah…apparently Seo made her some chicken soup and Taeyeon question her about it. The interaction was kind of weird and I didn’t understand what was happening… but the point is – Seohyun’s chicken soup must be magical if even Taeyeon unnie asks about it. Mmm… I wish I could taste it too…”

“OUCH SUNNY-AH!” Yoona screamed when Sunny hit the back of her head.

“IDIOT, I TOLD YOU NOT TO TALK ABOUT FOOD! THAT’S ALL YOU TALK ABOUT!”

Yoona pouted and looked down. “Sorry.” Then sigh and questioned “but really…I mean… something is off, right?”

“Well, I have no idea why Taeyeon dislikes Seohyun in the first place so… wait… I have an idea!” Sunny snapped her fingers and made the face that screamed ‘I’m brilliant.’

“So…eh… you’re going to tell me about it or stare in front of you like some idiot?”

“OUCH SUNNY-AH!”

 

I Don’t Like You [Part 3]

Sunny smiled apologetically “she’s just really sick and couldn’t come today. Tae mentioned something about having fever… I hope it is okay that you will have to work with me for the day, Seohyun?”

“Of course unnie… no problem at all,” younger girl smiled. A sincere smile.

That’s how the day went. Sunny took care of all the business, arranged some meetings, followed Hyun to her practice and recorded the stuff that’s necessary for Taeyeon to see later. Truthfully, she was pissed off at her friend. Only Taeyeon could pull this shit. Yes, she had a lot of leave days and could have chosen them at any given time but no… never before Taeyeon considered it even while barely standing on her feet. Never before – until one week while working with Seohyun passed.

It didn’t seem that Seohyun disliked Taeyeon and quite the contrary… Sunny guessed that this girl wasn’t that aware of the situation and the dislike. Whenever Seohyun mentioned her manager a.k.a. the horrible and irresponsible midget, she made excuses that Taeyeon is just an introvert and needs to get used to her… which is true… but what if she never treats Seohyun like somehow who deserves to be valued? That’s certainly worrying…

Sunny started panicking even more when after the day work was finished Seohyun stopped her before leaving and asked in a small but hopeful voice.

“Sunny unnie, maybe you have the address of my manager? I just… I want to see if she’s doing alright. She never took sick days before… so you know… it might be really serious… maybe I should even bring her some cabbage soup… or other vegetable soups? Chicken soup? People usually bring soup for sick people, right?”

Seohyun kept on rambling and it made Sunny change her mind. At first, she considered telling that she doesn’t know where Taeyeon lives (though who would believe that. Everyone knows that those two were really good friends inside and outside of job.) Later on, seeing that Seohyun is quite determined to visit Tae no matter what, she gave up with a sigh and a fake smile. “Sure, Hyun. I will write it down for you. Chicken soup might work best.. Tae… she’s not really a fan of vegetable soup…”

“Oh! Thank you for the tip and thank you very much for the address!”

Seohyun hugged Sunny before running off and smaller of the two sigh for the second time today. Sunny did look a bit worried about her decision “I should probably go and write my testament.”

 

xxx

Though Taeyeon did take a sick day, it wasn’t for the obvious reason. She felt alright, psychically at least. What Taeyeon needed was just one day away from her worst enemy Seohyun…

That girl was everywhere and at any given time. Taeyeon just left a bathroom – the girl stopped in front of her with a wide smile saying that she’s next in line. Taeyeon brought food and sat down in the cafeteria to enjoy her lunch – Seohyun sat in front of her telling her how nice it is to spend the time with someone while eating. Seohyun even scolded her if Tae was late for her practice or other important event.

It usually ended with a scene of Taeyeon running and panting, smiling apologetically to all the others in a room and growling when Seohyun rushed next to her asking why she’s late.

That girl was simple unbearable.

 

xxx

Taeyeon groan for the seventh time already. She tried to cover her head with the pillow, even knowing that it will not endure the sound of her doorbell that kept on ringing.

After few minutes of torture she threw her pillow and unwillingly get off the bed.

“Coming! Just wait a minute, will you?!”

At this point Taeyeon just let her feet drag her to the door of her apartment, while still mumbling some curses under her breath.

“What do you want?”

Taeyeon asked without checking before opening the door and wanted to face palm instantly. There she was… the person she tried, really TRIED to avoid for at least one day.

Who else if not Seohyun was standing behind her apartment door with a shy smile and a bag that certainly contained chicken soup.

“What is this sorcery?” Taeyeon mumbled losing any hope left.

I Don’t Like You [Part 2]

Sunny covered her face with both of her hands in a way avoiding the view in front of herself. “Omg stop pouting what the hell! You look like a twelve year old!”

Taeyeon huffed and leaned back in her chair, unhappy that this method didn’t work with Sunny. “Why can’t you just do it?”

“Because that’s your job, moron.”

“But you know I don’t like her!”

“Why?”

Silence.

“Why you don’t like her? Tell me and maybe I’ll change my mind and help you out… a little bit at least. Though it is still not my job, moron.”

“…”

“Not gonna tell me?”

Taeyeon stood up with a sigh “whatever.” She walked away leaving Sunny to be and in a way shortie felt victorious, though on the other hand she was still curious what made Taeyeon dislike Seohyun in the first place.

Everyone liked Seohyun. EVERYONE. Sure, the girl was a bit too strict with some things, health has always been her main priority, she probably ate at the same time every day, went to bed at the same time and well… she was just really proper.

At the same time Seohyun was really friendly with everyone surrounding her. Nice and kind. People liked her for that. Even Yoona looked pass that time when Seohyun found her eating hamburger and told her that if she keeps on eating it, she will die.

What was so irritating to Taeyeon? Sunny wished she could just know. Her friend was turning into a kid, whining when she has to spend time with Seohyun, smiling like crazy if some job gets canceled or being late just because she’s dreading the moment until she gets to see the girl.

“Gosh Taeng, how about that promise of being professional?”

 

xxx

“Taeyeon unnie?”

Don’t. Just keep on walking. Don’t look back. You don’t need this. You’re okay. She will disappear. That’s just your imagination.

“Taeyeon unnie?”

Maybe I’m just dreaming? It can’t be that I’m hearing this whenever I go… I started having nightmares too… Seohyun is everywhere… Just keep on walking. 

“Unnie?”

Pretend that she’s not here. Who could blame you? She’s not here. She’s not running after you. SHE’S NOT HERE.

“UNNIE?”

“WHAT?”

Seohyun stepped back surprised after Taeyeon outburst but smiled in friendly manner soon after. Taeyeon ignored her existence for two years so this hostility didn’t surprise her much. Of course, Seohyun still hoped that they could get passed it and get more comfortable around each other.

“Oh, I just wanted to say good morning. I’ll see you in fan signing event later, right?”

Good morning, my ass.

Taeyeon was once again forced, but somehow this time it looked like her face kept on convulsing. Her determination wasn’t enough to keep that smile on her face and younger girl noticed the weird face Taeyeon made. She reached out her hand touching her shoulder “Are you okay, unnie?”

Feeling a bit uncomfortable because of the touch Taeyeon stepped back and glared at Seohyun. “I’m fantastic! Fantastic baby!”

I should stop listening to Big Bang… what the hell. The told to herself while wincing again. “Yeah yeah… good morning, I’ll see you in the event… I need some fresh air. Bye.”

Taeyeon turn around and trot away.

“Fantasic baby?”

xxx

“UNNIE!”

Taeyeon let her face to hit the table. Literally. Just hearing that familiar voice made her want to puke.

“UNNIE ARE YOU OKAY?” Seohyun rushed over, not reading into Taeyeon’s reaction and instead slouching next to her.

Taeyeon raised her head slowly, ready to retort until she was met with concern face of younger girl.

Too close.

Seohyun touch her forehead with concern. “Unnie you might get a bump… I’ll bring some ice.” She stood up and rushed out of the cabinet leaving Taeyeon sitting and staring after her.

Few minutes later Seohyun ran back inside with a pack of ice and stopped in front of older girl slowly and carefully covering her forehead “here. Better, right?”

“Fantastic baby!”

“Unnie… I liked Big Bang too but… it is a bit weird hearing it from you.”

Kill me now.

I Don’t Like You [Part 1]

“Wait really… you will be working with SeoHyun? I thought that’s the only idol you well… I haven’t heard you saying nice things about the girl.” Sunny commented with suspenseful glare. She knew her co-worker slash best friend too well and during all those years working in this business and taking care of the group, she hadn’t voiced out her thoughts about Seohyun. Actually, it seemed that Taeyeon just snared whenever conversation went that way.

Too proper.

Too boring.

Too ordinary.

Too goody too-shoes.

Those were the only things that Sunny heard from Taeyeon whenever she had to address younger girl, expect the times when she pretended that she didn’t exist in the first place.

“Are you sure that… you know… you can’t switch with someone else? I care about both of you…and… well… I think at this point I care more about Hyun… you will make her life a living hell.”

Taeyeon just scoffed at such thoughts. “As if.”

“You don’t like her and you will be working on her career…promoting her, following her to all important events… organizing things too… don’t you feel sorry for the girl? You will probably leave her behind and don’t even tell her important things.”

Sunny wasn’t sure how many times she heard Taeyeon’s scoff this day, but she was close to losing patience because of it. “TAENG!”

“I’m a professional okay? I won’t do anything that could harm her career so calm down Sun, really… I won’t… also, do you think I have a choice? I tried saying no but I even had an ultimatum that it is either her or… nothing… and I do need to keep myself busy… so can you not? I already have migraine… do you actually know that girl? She’s annoying and I doubt she will give me any peace… gosh… she was annoying all these years before I got appointed to be her manager… so I don’t even want to think how all of this will turn out to be now… I’m screwed…”

“YOU’RE BEING MELODRAMATIC!”

“SAYS THE ONE’S SHOUTING AT ME!”

Sunny and Taeyeon continued screaming at each other about quite pointless stuff until the moment they heard someone knocking.

Seohyun, the reason of Taeyeon’s nightmares, smiled shyly while walking inside “oh…sorry to interrupt… they send me here.” The girl kept on smiling apologetically and looked down unsure who to address. “I’m here about my manager… I know there has been a switch…”

Taeyeon just glared at the younger girl while Sunny sigh already sensing that nothing good will come from this “Yeah… about that…”

Seohyun instantly looked up and seemed hopefully after hearing Sunny talk. Maybe she assumed that Sunny will be her new manager. That wasn’t a bad idea since Sunny took care of girls as her own… her approach was definitely more friendly and understanding than the icy log sitting on a chair and without moving. Yes. Kim Taeyeon.

Sunny could read the relief evident on Seohyun’s face and smiled apologetically “I think I should leave you two to talk for a bit…it is not me by the way, your new manager is Taeyeon…” Sunny rushed away after voicing it out not wanting to see disappointment on Seohyun’s face. She did hear a small “oh” though.

 

xxx

Sunny ran off without looking so she accidentally bumped into Yoona. As per usual Yoona didn’t hide her curiosity after noticing the panic in Sunny’s eyes. “You okay?”

“Oh you know… just… Taeyeon got appointed to take over Seohyun’s old manager and we all know that…she doesn’t like the girl. No one knows the reason but… I have a feeling this won’t end well… also Hyun didn’t look happy after realizing that it is not me whose going to work with her.”

Yoona was quick to change her mind and turn to walk with Sunny though her initial plan was go have a little chat with Taeyeon.

“You’re not going there anymore?”

“Oh…I just realized that I’m hungry. I’m famished!”

 

xxx

 

Seohyun cough feeling uncomfortable because of Taeyeon’s stare.

“So?”

“So?”

“you’re… you’re my new manager?”

“How did you guess?” Taeyeon asked sarcastically.

“But unnie it is not a bad thing … maybe we can spend more time together… we never had a chance to do so… now we can try being friends. I mean… we will have to spend every day together for now on… so that’s not a bad idea, right? We will just have to get used to spending all this time together.” Younger girl mumbled probably trying to convince both Taeyeon and herself.

Taeyeon should have known. Leave it to Seohyun to turn it all around and try to look positively at something that she considered punishment from God and her worst nightmare.

She faked a smile, after all, making sure that Seohyun could see through her since her voice stayed sarcastic “I can’t wait.”